OUT OF CONTEXT
Only at The Washington Times: Carleton Bryant humor targets politics, entertainment and latest breaking news.
Latest Blog Entries
Nervous investors opt for zero-interest bonds
In an attempt to minimize their losses, some investors are putting their money in bonds that offer zero interest. The core of our economic problem is that our money no longer works for us. We've got to get it up and working again. Lazy money!
Calif. could have no money by March
California faces deep cuts in state jobs this month and could be out of cash by March. Too bad the Golden State isn't one of the Big Three automakers. Or actually made of gold.
Scientists: Manmade global warming is a sham
A growing cadre of international scientists say human activity is not the cause of global warming. As they score it: Sun 1, Man 0.
Restaurant jobs vanish in shrinking economy
Restaurant owners are cutting back on job as customers avoid eating out during the economic downturn. Expect to see more waiters and waitresses turn to acting to make ends meet, especially in Hollywood.
Broadway shows face the ax because of the economy
Broadway theaters have seen their audiences shrink as the economy has worsened and several shows face early ends. The show must go on — but with less overhead.
AIG looking for another $10 billion
The insurance company that has received $150 billion from the federal government says it needs a little bit. Just a little bit, nothing too big. A few billion, just a few. No need to make a federal case out of it.
Political moms on the move — to D.C.
The moms of Michelle Obama, Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden say they will move to Washington. Hope they get along with the in-laws.
White House, Democrats near bailout deal for car makers
The White House and Democratic leaders have reached a tentative bailout deal for Detroit automakers. As they say, "Every little bit helps." Especially when the help comes in billions of dollar bills.
Joe the Plumber says John McCain 'appalled' him
Joe the Plumber says the Republican presidential nominee "appalled" him with his answers on federal bailouts. Politics ain't pretty, unlike plumbing.
Report: Jack in the Box burger is bad health value
A food-monitoring center says a Jack in the Box bacon cheeseburger is high in fat and carcinogens. Oh but it tastes sooo good!
Ships must slow down for whales
A new maritime law will force large ships and ocean liners to slow down near whales. It's not a fluke — moby it can save lives. Sorry about that. Really.
Book author, 9, gets movie deal
The 9-year-old boy who wrote a book about how to talk to girls now has a movie deal. I hate this kid. I really hate this kid.
Court nixes Larry Craig's appeal
A Minnesota court has turned down Republican Sen. Larry Craig's appeal resulting from a notorious men's room incident last year.
Coffee shortage on the horizon
A smaller coffee harvest is expected to produce a major shortage next year. What am I supposed to dunk my doughnut in? Spring water?
Gov. Blagojevich accused of corruption
Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich, a Democrat, was arrested at his home and charged with corruption. He says he was only trying to follow the example set by his predecessor. Looks like he's got that one nailed.
