OUT OF CONTEXT
Only at The Washington Times: Carleton Bryant humor targets politics, entertainment and latest breaking news.
Latest Blog Entries
The rich are getting poorer
Vanity Fair, the tome of economical lifestyles, reports that rich New Yorkers have been shedding some of their extravagances to make ends meet in the economic downturn. The rich are getting poorer! Just remember that "rich" and "poor" are relative terms, as in "if you have a rich aunt, you're not really that poor."
Homeland security chief charged with hiring illegals
Lorraine Henderson, a homeland security director in New England, has been charged with hiring an illegal immigrant from Guatemala. Homeland security ain't what it used to be.
Park visitors allowed to pack heat
The Bush administration is allowing visitor to most national parks to carry concealed and loaded weapons. I think I can hear the Obama administration adding to its list of policies to overturn.
Economy conjures less glitzy Xmas cards
The economy downturn has inspired Christmas card makers to tone down the glitz and festiveness of their work. Now what kind of spirit is that?
Obama's not a Zune dude
President-elect Barack Obama's staff says he is still an iPod kind of guy and used a Zune recently by accident. Whew! That was close!
O.J. to serve at least 9 years
O.J. Simpson, convicted of armed robbery and kidnapping in Las Vegas, will have to serve at least nine years in prison. He'll bounce back. He always does.
Ted Leonsis reaches friend limit on Facebook
Ted Leonsis has been forced to stop adding friends to his Facebook page, having reached the limit. Tough luck, Ted. There's still a lot of friends out there to befriend.
Study: Happiness is contagious
Researchers studying 5,000 people for more than 20 years have found that happiness spreads quickly through social networks. Guess this is what they call "good" news, but it still sounds like a medical story to me.
Hillary to take pay cut at State
Sen. Hillary Clinton will have to forgo a $5,000 pay raise to become secretary of state. C'mon! Hasn't she been through enough? This is the bureaucratic version of piling on.
Several cities could have no daily newspapers
A credit rating firm in Chicago says that "several cities" could be without a daily newspaper in just a couple of years. If that happens, what will people use to house train their puppies? Junk mail?
Dems want Obama to take on the economy
Some Democrats are saying that President-elect Barack Obama needs to be more assertive in working on the economy. Obama says there can only be one president at a time. Now I'm confused.
Obama raised $104 million
Barack Obama raised $104 million in October and November for his campaign. And people wonder why the economy is out of whack — his campaign sucked up all the money!
McCain camp spent oodles on Palin's locks
The McCain campaign spent more than $110,000 for a hair stylist and a makeup artist to travel with and tend to Sarah Palin. It just proves the old saying that good hair does not come cheap.
Oprah hits Palin rumors
Talk show host Oprah Winfrey says she'd love to talk to Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin. But only if she promises to jump on her couch.
O.J. gets his sentence today
O.J. Simpson will find out how long he will be behind bars — and this time, those bars don't serve fruited drinks.
